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Wednesday, March 31, 2004

Been playing around with my blogpage. I found a political blog by Tom Green. I'm adding it to Deafies' Blogs.

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The inferno has been doused...

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Me nosy and ballistic? Sorry, that's where you're wrong.

Clitch, no worries. He just happened to mention your name and just trying to make a big deal. Just let him throw a tantrum. Just simply nod your head and put on your best fake smile. :-D

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You talk no good! You were saying you believe what RT says about "it's my blog and I say whatever I wanna say"...to that effect. Yet, I said something, some time ago, of what I was feeling and you got all nosy and went ballistic. Dumbfuck!

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Witch, just re-read your blog. Clitch misunderstood me. I've never once said that you were experimenting with the Live Journal because of us.
Clitch, get your wall-eyes back in place!

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I vee'd the links that RT provided in regards to Walmart. Walmart literally wants to be a "one-stop" place. I have to admit that I do go to Walmart for their low prices. Ok, let me make that clear. Shop there for clothes...FORBIT! But, things like shampoo, cat food, etc.
However, if you think about it...Walmart isn't the only business that are doing this kind of thing. This thing called sprawling. McDonald's is practically everywhere. They also own Donato's Pizzas, Boston Market and Chipotle. Starbucks is another...they're like rabbits! I guess it's not a big deal about these business cuz they're just focus on one aspect of products...food or coffee, etc. Walmart is doing everything! Food, clothing, gas, furniture, etc.

Moving on...Carrie, thanks for your kind words. :-) Nice to know that someone, out there, like to read my blogs. :-) I've read yours and Beth's. You guys are funny! I love your first entry about you and RT watching someone j/o to gay porns. That is sooo funny! I told RT that only shit like that would ever happen to him. You and Beth have shared so much stories about RT. I have a short story to tell you about RT. You know how RT loves to start a drama show, right? Here's a classic one:

Day: Saturday Location: Deaf Expo in downtown DC We're all looking around at booths at a Deaf Expo. You know....booth hopping for free things and chatting with old friends...bs, bs, bs. Anyways, there was a Deaf guy there who claimed to be an ex-gay. Earlier in time, he had written an article, in the Post (I believe), about how students at Gallaudet end up being homosexuals, especially by the time one graduates from Gally. He said that he was a student there and he became gay. Since he left Gallaudet, he has since left that lifestyle. (Mind you that this isn't verbatim. I'm sure RT will correct me if there's any corrections needed.) Anyways, that ex-gay was there and RT saw him. He went and grabbed Dylan W. and dragged him to that ex-gay. Here I am, watching this whole thing as if it was a television show. RT tapped the ex-gay and says "Dylan here just graduated from Gally and he's not gay. Explain that!" The ex-gay was just at loss for words...or should I say...signs. I thought...omigod, I better get Kitch over here to watch this. Well, by the time I dragged Kitch back...the show was over. I think RT said that the ex-gay left...as if caught by his own words that he was mistaken. So, it's like...you better be careful what you write, cuz knowing RT, he'll try to prove you wrong. ;-)

Read an article today about a painting, thought to be originally fake, is now believe to be painted by Vermeer..."Young Woman Seated at the Virginals". All Deafies who have taken Art Appreciation class under (Dr.?) M. Glass, should know who the heck is Vermeer. Glass was obsessed with Vermeer. That was all she would talk about. Vermeer this and Vermeer that. So, I'll never forget Vermeer or some of his paintings. I remember when Tracy Chavelier wrote her first book, Girl With The Pearl Earring. I immediately recognized the painting on the front cover as a painting of Vermeer's.

Witch, grow up! I happened to found out about your other blog, via Bobby's blog. I told him the exact same thing you said...that you were experimenting with it. Told him to read your blog carefully as you had mentioned you had another one. He just happened to be viewing it when you busted him looking at your blog.

Anyways, I'll post some more later on. Gotta get to work.

ta ta

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Tuesday, March 30, 2004

Kenny...vee! Everyone is bi? Maybe you and others...but not THIS fag! I'm gay all the way! Pussyjuice...FORBIT! ;-)

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Bored? Then read this: Tales from the City:Gay Sex and the City

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What is up with pimples?!? Is that like God's way of picking on us? Finish! You mind?!?!

This damn weather is sooooo wishy-washy! I'm having allergies again. I better not get sick again.

I've finally got some answers about the surgery/extraction of my wisdom teeth. Seems the tentative date is April 30th. However, the insurance is giving the dr. totally different info than I got. So, have to do this BS emailing around and getting the air cleared about what's covered and what's not. Grrr!

Today, Safeway and Giant stores are closed in this area. The unions are meeting to discuss and vote. Apparently, if resolutions are not met or whatever, there is a possible strike, such as the recent one in CA. However, Safeway and Giant are prepared for that as they have their managers and temp workers ready to work, in case a strike occurs. What they have to discuss doesn't look good. Apparently, they have to raise costs and lower pay for new workers. For example, new workers will be paid less for Sundays and holidays. New workers will be paying more for health coverage. New workers' family members will not be covered, until that employee has worked 6 years. In other words, not good for new workers.

If you go back in about 6 months. Kroger, Safeway, Giant and other grocers have been having to meet with unions. Apparently, they're having to battle with Wal-mart. Safeway has had to sell their stores in CA. Wal-mart is on a roll these days. Target, Toys-R-Us, Kay-Bee and K-mart are struggling to compete with Wal-mart. Stores just can't compete with Wal-mart's low prices. The grocers are struggling with Wal-mart SuperCenters.

I guess you just have to be a really good stores and willing to compete aggressively by lowering prices. For example, H-E-B. H-E-B is THE grocery store in southern Texas. Although, they're slowly expanding towards northern Texas. Kroger, Albertsons and Handy-Andy have all folded, due to H-E-B's aggressive competition. Now, it's Wal-mart SuperCenters, Target Greatlands and H-E-B. Yet, H-E-B isn't struggling.

Don't be surprised if gas stations will be struggling with Wal-mart. I haven't seen any gas stations at Wal-mart over here in the East Coast. However, I have seen them elsewhere. Believe me, gas at Wal-mart is cheaper...even if it's 10 cents cheaper. Hey, consumers love low prices! More money in their pockets.

Anyways...don't wanna get way in too deep about that shit. It was nice to talk to 2 old friends, via AIM. Shane and Dean. Shane is a good friend of mine as well as a fellow frat bro. He's somewhere near Portland, pursuing his Master's. He lives in the boonies. Although, he didn't quite say that but the way he described his surroundings...sounds like the boonies to me. I dunno how he survives that because I know he's a city boy, just like me. I'd go stir-crazy after spending maybe 3 days in the boonies. I'll be like...I need to be smelling air pollution just to feel safe. Ya know... Sad, but true.

Dean was so funny yesterday. It was good to talk with him. I have added him on my blog links. He has a blog, even though it's just one day's worth...from last year. He """says""" that he'll try to update his blog. See see...

Finally heard from CSD about the damn webcam. We were just about to give up and go with Sorensen. However, just got an email from CSD yesterday. Seems that we have to go to them to pick it up. Oh no no no! Mail it! Or too poor for stamps?

Anyways...gotta pretend I'm busy working.

ta ta

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Monday, March 29, 2004

Ridor...I agree...Clitch was fulfilling his duties when he serviced this soldier. You're never too young to learn to be patriotic. Clitch, you get a gold star sticker from me. Everyone *applause* for Clitch! *flicking tears from my eyes*

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If only the Drama Queen, Mike, heard about this upcoming blogdrama between Ridor and Clitch. He would say "drama! drama! drama!" (LOL!) Ridor, where the fuck is he? Tell him to update his blog!

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OMG! Blogdrama between Ridor and Clitch. Get the popcorn!

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Yesterday was a pretty good day. Nothing fancy. Last night, Kitch and I went to pick up Mitch and Clitch and then we all went out to some Texas BBQ restaurant. Good food. Then, came over to our place to play some games. Simple evening but nice to spend it with friends.

Looks like it'll be raining for the rest of the week. *groans*

What is up with people having bad elevator manners? For example, you're in the elevator and when the doors slide open...you're trying to get your big fat flat ass out and people just come walking in, without giving the others a chance to get off. WTF? Like...do you mind?!? I'm often tempted to push their foreheads back with my middle finger. Seriously!

I wonder if Roe is ok. I haven't seen her online since Thursday. Roe, IM me as soon as you read this!

Some interesting articles I read this morning, while on the Metro. Today, in Tyler, Texas...the stoning trial begins. Last year on Mother's Day weekend, this mother stoned her 3 boys. 2 of them died, 8 and 6 y/o's. A 14 month old boy was found alive but bleeding. He's still recovering to this day! And...the father slept through it all! The mother said that "God told her to do it." And the hubby is supporting her. Fucked up!

Another interesting article about drug testing. With more than 40 million drug tests conducted each year, the industry of trickery has become a hot business. Urine Luck, a urine addictive to tamper positive results in the specimen cup. Get Clean Shampoo, for hair. Supposedly, when drug tests are conducted with hair...the root (I believe) is supposed to indicate drug usage for a year prior. (dang!) Quick Fizz for saliva tests. The best of all, the Whizzinator, a fake penis that comes in 5 skin tones. You can store "good" urine in there and take a leak. This is suppose to fool the overseers that it is your "real" penis. Vee! More than 55% of those that have been tested have been positive for marijuana.
Gosh, imagine if weed was legal? The national debt would be paid off in record time! Seriously! Who is too blind to see that?

Another article is that as of midnight earlier this morning, Ireland has banned smoking indoors. This is supposedly the first nation in the world to do so.

While I was searching for links for the articles, I came across this one. Interesting! Supposedly men who are circumcised are less likely to get HIV. Oooooooh...this is one hot debate. However, it seems to focus just on HIV not on STD's. Let me know what you think...

Anyways, better get back to work...

ta ta

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Sunday, March 28, 2004

Yesterday, I took Kitch to....(drum roll, please...Deaf style)....Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Baily Circus..."the greatest show on Earth." That was my surprise for him. Apparently, this is the first time Kitch has ever been to one. According to his recollection, that is. If so, I'm so happy to break his circus virginity. Nonetheless, we had a good time there. We were like...if we have kids, shit, we'll have to buy them something or they'll scream their heads off. So, we were like...ok, we'll have to buy them ONE thing. They can pick any ONE thing they want and that's it. That sounds fair. Things there look expensive but then how often do you go to the circus? Once a year?

I miss going to the circus on a yearly basis. My parents and I would always go there. I loved it. Every year there's always a special show. This year, they had motorcycles going around in this metal sphere. Wow! You have to be fearless to do that kind of shit. They also had all male trapeze show...all of them shirtless. *Is it hot in here?* Anyways, bottom line, Kitch and I enjoyed ourselves and don't mind going back next year. Perhaps a group of us go? See see...

Got up early this morning to do our traditional Easter brunch with 4 other friends. We usually do it on Easter morning but one of our friends is doing internship in another state. She's just in town for this week for her Spring Break. So, we decided to have it early. We have brunch at Cheasapeake Beach. We had a good time until some of us brought up some sensitive subjects. Gosh...drama, drama, go away...come back another day! You mind?!?

One of the topics that was brought up was about hearies correcting Deafies on signs. I said...oh no no no...forbit! (Background on "forbit": Lee Wittig, a drama queen-wannabe, couldn't spell "forbidden" or maybe it was a typo. Since then, Clitch and I have made fun of that and used that with each other. [See, I told you that Clitch is mean!] So...forbit!) Anyways, it's a long story and not gonna get into it. However, I know you Deafies out there would NOT LIKE a hearie correcting your signs. From an interpreter? Still forbit! From a CODA? Oh...dunno, dunno...but most would still...forbit! This one person said...how would I like it if a hearie corrected me on how I pronounced a word? I said fine. That person is hearie and would know how to pronounce it if I pronounced that particular word wrong. I would appreciate the correction...it would help me not look like a fool in the future, right? It doesn't matter that I've known English my whole life...if a hearie corrects me on pronounciation...I would welcome it. Now, if a Deafie corrected me on my pronounciation...I might be hard-headed about it. LOL Kitch and I sometimes do that to each other and we go straight to our computer and look up www.dictionary.com and read the pronounciation. Sometimes he's right...sometimes me...and sometimes either pronounciation is acceptable.

After the brunch, Kitch and I played on those casino games. There's a row of machines to gamble, inside the restaurant. I won $50 bucks! Really, got a total of $60 bucks. I put in $20 and played and played til I was down 10 bucks and then won $50! It is such a good day after all!

Talked with RT via pager/online while on the way home. Talked about several things. Talked about how hearies have emailed RT to ask wtf is "vee". Funny cuz I get emails/IMs from Deafies about that. Yeah, I guess you just have to be there to undy it. But, "vee" will spread throughout the community over time. Even though, in reality, you actually say "ppttt" when veeing. We just say "vee" to exaggerate.

Arrived to Safeway to do our weekly shopping. Discovered that Safeway will be closed Tuesday. Kitch said something about Safeway and Giant unions will meet. Possible strike if no resolutions? Shit!

At the end of my shopping, I was telling RT that some of us still sign "y-e-s", in his style. You know...a foot stomp and signing y-e-s in a very small upward arc and pouty lips. Ofc, he signs that everyday.

Gosh, miss those signs. "Fakey ho"..."alright"...that cheerleading shit...what else? We all still fling our imaginary long hair.

RT, seriously, when the ASP bros get together...you must, must, must go. It's time for us queens to meet! Hope you get your ass down for CobraFest! Wanna see you get fucked up and vomit bratwurts. LOL That'll be a sight! (Stupid Clitch, you influenced me to be mean. Finish!)

All kidding aside...Kitch and I miss RT. And dammit, we will go up to NYC one of these days. Hopefully real soon.

Ok, I better get off and cuddle up with Kitch.

ta ta

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Saturday, March 27, 2004

Two Blue Balls I is the vee.

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Kitch took the quiz last night...his is Unitarianism. Interesting!

Last night was an enjoyable night. We went to see the Gally Dance Co. show. The auditorium was hot. You know...Gally's old system...can't turn on the a/c until like middle of May...which, by the time that rolls around, everyone is like getting ready to head out for the summer. Geez! Nonetheless, it was a good show. Good to see Tara still dancing! Saw LaToya...gosh, been 4 years since I last saw her. She's now living in MD. So, maybe I'll see her around more than before. Saw Faisal. Been seeing him here and there, more often. Wondering if he's schooling at Gally or nearby? Ofc, saw another queen...Irvine. You shoulda seen him...waving to the whole auditorium. Yep, that's a queen! Surprised to see that the Wild Zappers weren't dancing this time. Saw Shawna. Been with her gf for 6 years. Wow! They just recently bought a house together, like 6 months ago. Kewlies.

Then, just came home to relax. We were both tired. It's been an interesting week for us. This weekend is also busy for us and next week, I'm sure we'll be busy as well. Sigh...

I heard that Gally, or rather Deaf Studies Dept, will be announcing who will be accepted into the graduate program this coming Monday. Damn, it's hard not to have high hopes. I keep telling myself not to expect anything. Telling myself to be cool.

Well, I better stop here and relax for a bit...before getting ready to take Kitch on a "date". It's a surprise and he doesn't know where we're going. I'll tell ya about it afterwards.

ta ta

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Friday, March 26, 2004

I is the vee this quiz. Try it! This Belief-O-Matic quiz will ask you about 20 questions in regards to spirituality and other beliefs. Then at the end, it will give you a list of religions (starting with 100% and down) suited to your beliefs. Mine is Sikhism (100%). Interesting!

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Interesting blog of a married man. Nothing dramatic but interesting.

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Kitch and I just got back from walking around the Mall. Beautiful day! Beautiful day! It was nice to vee people and sculptures. In my office now, gonna eat some plump strawberries. MMMMMM!

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Whooo...I may have not been in the mood to work, yesterday, but I sure was put to work, like a dog. Dinna eat lunch til about almost 4. Dang! After work, Kitch and I went to have dinner with our landlord/friend at Ruby Tuesday's. Haven't been to that restaurant in ages. I think it was because they used to served small loaves of bread in a basket, while you were waiting for your orders. But, they stopped that long time ago. And Kitch was like...fuck that, I'm going elsewhere! *snap* Whoa, baby! I like it when you get bitchy! Turns me on! ;-) Woof, woof!

Anyways, I was impressed with Ruby Tuesday's. They have a good number of selections for those on the Atkins or South Beach diets. We had a burger with wraps. Very delicious! Now, why didn't we think of that before? So, we're excited cuz now we know what to have with our burgers in the summer. Kitch and I love to have our meats grilled! Isn't summer great?!?!?

Thank God today is Friday! It'll be even more wonderful when the clock strikes at 5:30. Yay! No work for 2 days! Yay! Yay!

Tonight, Kitch and I will go watch the Gallaudet Dance Company. Hope to see our crazy friends there. Hopefully, it'll be a good show. Tara Miles is still dancing all through these years. The Wild Zappers...they better have some new dance shows! If not...I'll be like "oh no no no...out of order!"

As some of you may know, Kitch and I love to watch these animal shows on cable. Especially those "animal cops" shows...such as Animal Precinct, based in NYC and Animal Cops (I think that's the name) in Houston, also in Detroit. Shit! Why do people mistreat their animals?!?!?!? WTF?!?! If you can't take care of your animals or don't have time for them or can't afford to feed them, why do you still have them? Call the local SPCA and turn them in. They will put them up for adoption, unless they're sick with some incurable disease or something else.

OMG. We saw this one show recently. This guy, wanting to make his dashund (sp?) tough and mean, hit his dog with a hammer...3 times! The result? The dog didn't turn out to be mean. The dog lost his fucking right eye! OMG! If I saw someone did that to a dog, shit...I'm afraid I'd be beating him with a hammer. "How'd you like that, mofo?!?"

However, there's something else that put humans to shame. Animals are very forgiving. This dog, that lost his eye, was still friendly to people. Tail wagging. No fear. Just being his playful self. Was even adopted by a lady. Dang! Animals are forgiving.

Tess! Welcome to the blogging world. Look forward to read some really juicy details of your life! heh

What is it about humans that just love to be voyeurs? Is it natural? Is it just plain ol' curiousity? I mean...most of love to read other people's blogs. What? To see if it's more interesting or to see how fucked up that person's life is? I don't mean it in a negative way but why are we voyeurs? Does it excite us? Not just blogs, but like...sex, accidents, reality shows, etc. Sex...we just can't look away from it. I'm sure if you caught someone having sex (with oneself, anothe person or an orgy), you would be like "hey, guys...come here, now! Look, look!" *gasp* We all love to feign disgust but hell, admit it....you are soooo turned on! Accidents or crime scenes are no different. No wonder there are traffic jams when there's an accident on the highway and EVERYONE just HAVE to LOOK. It's not like y'all have never seen an accident before. And as soon as you pass by the accident site....the traffic jams are no more. What is up with that? Ya know... Crime scenes...we just have to look. We just have to be right up in the face of origins. No wonder cops are posted to set up a boundary...regardless of the yellow tape. Reality shows...gosh, they're so popular. Yeah, you may say....ewww, I don't watch those. Buuuuullshit! You know you flip the channels and you see a reality show and just have to watch a couple minutes of it. And then you're like..."oh, my God...the drama!" We all are peeping Toms! We're just curious by nature. Just don't be like that unlucky cat...

ta ta

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Thursday, March 25, 2004

I'm sooooo not in the mood to work. Sigh...

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RT....oh boy, I sure hope you'll survive NYC. Please, please don't end up as a permanent resident at Bellevue (sp?). Kitch and I, one time, saw a special on HBO or Showtime about Bellevue. Shit! Imagine walking down the hall and just being on edge, not knowing what will pop up in front of you. The rants and the raves that occur there. Shit!

Roe came over last night. Had dinner. Then, rowed! Shit! Couldn't finish it. I was like...enough! Gosh, lost count of how many peaks I've hit. Anyways, we talked about many topics. One of the topics was about writing. I was telling her how technology has taken over our methods of writing. Not too long ago, we were pretty much writing by hand. Now, everything is done on the keyboard. I'm sure there's been time where you had to write on paper and you're just like blaaaaaah! It's like...after writing 2 or 3 sentences, your hand already hurts from writing. Ever felt like that?

I'm already spoiled with the online bill pay. Sometimes when that's not possible, I pull out my checkbook. I have that second where I'm like..."shit, I hope I still remmy how to write out a check." By the time I start writing, it all comes back to me.

That's also another reason why I don't mind writing blog entries. It's so much easier than to hand write a journal book. Shit! If I had a journal book, I don't think I'd be writing anything in it. There are a few stuff that I don't mind writing by hand...for example, my poetry. I guess my methods are still from "old school". I tend to write my poems on paper and then I'll type it up on the computer. Heard lots of people write it up on the computer and then make edits. For some reason, that doesn't work on me. I'm sure if I go back to school for my master's, I prolly will write my draft on paper before writing on the computer. I know most people write on the computer, regardless.

Anyways, if I writing by hand, for sure I would not have said this much. I'd be like...."Hi..had fun with Rosey last night. Ta ta" Seriously!

Well, still waiting for the oral surgeon to call me. I called the hospital and said "wtf?!?" (Ok, that was an exaggeration but you get the gist.) Said they finally heard from my insurance. However, my dr. has to find an open appointment slot and then will call me. Geez! Does it take THAT long to find an open slot? I'm like...hell-o!

Well, hopefully the cold weather is gone til next year. Seriously! I'm tired of the cold! I'm ready to feel the warmth of the sun. I'm ready to be coatless!

Ok, I guess I better stop and start working. Haven't read the Express paper yet. Perhaps I'll read an interesting article and tell you about it. So far, nothing interesting, except that atheist father making a big deal about "under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance. Good God, get over it!

ta ta

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Wednesday, March 24, 2004

OMG! Remmy Dan? One of the most infamous/famous (take your pick) gay participants to appear on Real World. Well, guess what? Found his blog site! Wanna read it? Then, get to it!

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Dammit! My stapler's jammed. Oh well, gives me an excuse to look online. I must be ADD'ing.

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Added a few links to my crazy friends' blog sites. Happy readings!

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Another death resulted from watching "The Passion...". Freaky!

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Found out that Bobby has a blogsite...really a live journal. Gosh, Bobby was my first roommate at Gallaudet. Gosh, I'll never forget that semester. My neighbors on the right were these 2 gays. Then, me and Bobby. My neighbor on the other said was also gay. And a few doors down the hall, was RT, along with another guy and frat bro, who eventually came out of the closet. And another guy, whom I have no idea if he's gay or not. At first, he was bi...then gay but now married has a kid. So, what are you? :-)

Anyways, I was reading Bobby's blog and I was laughing because that's how he is. Love that part where he was talking about his tattoo. I remember, while as roomies, seeing that tatttoo and I thought "of course, only a fag would sport a butterfly tattoo". It wasn't until some time later I found out that it was actually a dick with butterfly wings. And the "antennas" are actually 2 spurts of cum. Bobby, you nasty! LOL

I see you went home for Spring Break. Did Audrey know you went home? Oh goodness, you're in deep shit if she found out you were in town and didn't go see her. Sorry, I'm not gonna lie for you. ;-) Some days you would find Bobby, Audrey and I deep in debates. Theological debates! Which is why I think to this day...I hate theological discussions.

Anyways...it's good to see Bobby whenever I see him. Just saw him recently at RAD's Mardi Gras party at Lulu's. He was recovering from back surgery. He was so happy to be out of bed and partying. Good ol' Bobby! Plus, he got fucked up! Ofc, Bobby will deny this.

Over time, I'll share a story or two about Bobby. Believe me, there's been so much drama, in ONE semester, with Bobby! Everyone knew him and everyone knew I was his roomie. So, if someone was looking for him, they would always asked me. Sometimes I knew and sometimes I didn't. But heck, I wasn't gonna tell them if I knew where he was...I wanted a piece of mind. Didn't want people to be banging the door or flashing the lights, while I was in my room, TRYING to study. Bobby to still be alive to this day...is a miracle!

Shocking to discover that he said in his blog, recently, that his hearing loss has gotten worse. I used to be so hard of hearing. When I met Bobby, I was like...shit, this dude is REALLY hard of hearing. I would just read your lips and could understand you with little problems. Bobby used to be doing his homework and tell me to talk to him, without having to read lips, and he would undy what I said. I was like...dude, what are you doing at Gally? So, Bobby, does this call for a celebration? :-)

Yesterday, Clitch and I had been IM'ing each other. Here and there throughout the day. We were just being bitchy and silly. Making each other laugh out loud and we, really he was, were being really mean. Clitch, now stop that! Seriously, or I'll come over and slap your silly dick off.

Rosey is coming over tonight! Girl, you better not eat dinner cuz I'm making something. So, come over hungry! Can't wait to catch up on news and shit with Roe.

Kitch and I have been looking for a house. Seems it's actually starting to look like a dream come true. Just when you actually thought you got over the worst part of the headache of filling out forms...we found out that we're gonna have to go through the second phase of the headache. Arrrgggh! Can't wait to get it over with!

I vee'd this blogsite last night. Check it out...Night-Time Musings.

ta ta

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Tuesday, March 23, 2004

Ahhh...I feel so refreshed, after having that day off yesterday. The same goes for Kitch. So, after this blog, I should be able to work on projects and get them done within a timely manner.

Yesterday was a surprising day. After we got back from Target, I got a couple surprise in the mail. A card/letter from my cousin, Susan, and a package from my mom's best friend, Cindy. Susan was basically updating me with news from back home. It's nice to be thought of and receive updates of the family. That was certainly much appreciated. I have to write back to her and tell her what's been going on over here. She's gotta come up here and par-tee!

The package from Cindy was really precious and surprising. I opened the box and the first thing I saw was a name plaque of my mom's at school. I certainly didn't expect that. It was very touching and gosh, was a bit emotional for a moment. Kitch said that when we moved into our new house, we'll set up that plaque in our library/computer room. Awww, so thoughtful of him. That's why I love him! And then, inside the packages were 4 children's book that I had donated to the school...way way back in those days. It was nice to take a short memory lane trip. Mom kept them in her classroom for her kindergartners to read. I guess Cindy didn't know that I had donated them. I guess she had seen my name inscribed in those books and thought to return them to me. And then, she threw in a couple bags of candies...just like my mother used to do. That was very thoughtful of her! Last of all, there was a picture included. It was a picture of my dad, my aunt Mary, and mom's 2 best friends, Michiko and Cindy. They were all dressed in red and it was of a Chinese motif. Cindy wrote saying that it was taken the night of my parents' anniversary. Had my mother lived another month...it would've been their 30th. Wow, imagine how Dad must've felt on their anniversary date.

It was special to know that my mother's students still talk of her. Told me that everyone is doing good with the exception of my aunt Mary, who's still emotional to this day. Well, that's understandable. My aunt Mary is the baby sister of the siblings. My aunt and my mom were the only relatives to live in San Antonio. All others are living in the valley or elsewhere. So, yeah...my aunt is sorely missing my mother, as we all are. Plus, they had a really hard childhood and my mother was their second mother. They've lost their mother like in '98, I believe. And now, my mother is gone. The next oldest sister is in Chicago and that's another LONG story. So, seems that my Aunt Mary is now the next matriarch of the family, on my mother's side that is.

Cindy was the last person I talked to, before my mother passed away. Mom had told me that if she was still living after Christmas, she wanted me to return home. So, the morning after Christmas, I was at the airport...all emotional. And then comes Cindy. It just so happened that her and her husband were at the airport, bound for China. They will become missionaries to China this coming summer. They were flying there to check out their new home and make it Americanized. You wouldn't believe how much their yearly rent is in China...$500! Yes, $500 a year is their rent! Gosh, wish that still exists here in the US. Wouldn't that be so nice? We had a good talk, while we were waiting for me to board.

Mom died 4 days after I flew home. Of course, Cindy was so upset. She couldn't fly back for the funeral. She was stuck in China for 2 weeks. Imagine being across the globe when your best friend has passed away?

Anyways, all that was going through my mind as I was reading Cindy's letter. It's certainly nice to be thought of. I'm definitely gonna send her a thank-you card. I'm looking forward to put up my mom's name plaque in our new home.

ta ta

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Monday, March 22, 2004

Today, Kitch and I stayed home from work. It was one of those days where you're like..."gosh, I just need a break from work and stay home a bit longer"...you know...a day to catch your breaths. Plus, we were tired...had been a little sick and it's a wonder what 3 extra hours of sleep can do to your well-being.

We got up and went to Pizza Hut for lunch. Mmmm! Haven't had pizza in a LOOOOONG time! It was so good. I was reading the history of Pizza Hut, while we were waiting for someone to take our order. Pizza Hut started with 2 brothers, in Wichita Falls, KS in 1958 (or was that 1968...damn, already forgot the year), and they borrowed $600 from their mother. Wow, $600 and look where Pizza Hut is now...all over the US. Imagine that! Bet the brothers had no inkling that they would eventually be this huge. Well, hey, they do make GOOD pizzas!

Then, we went to Target to look at some stuff. I ended up buying some stuff for scrapbooking. I realized that there is a whole lot more to buy. So, I told myself...that I'll just buy little by little and save them all up. When I get all the basic stuff that I need, then I'll start on them. So, I started with about $25 dollars worth of scrapbooking materials. Can't wait till these stuff accumulate and then work on some good projects. I'm looking forward to that.

Tomorrow, I'm gonna call the oral surgeon and see what the hell is going on. Does it really take more than 2 weeks for the dr. to get approval from my insurance to extract my wisdom teeth? Dang! I'm so looking forward to that lovely bottle of Percocet. heh

Guess tomorrow I'll head back to work. Should feel more rested up than before.

Wanna read one more blog? Check out Realm of the Mystic Dragon.

ta ta


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Sunday, March 21, 2004

Friday night, Kitch and I went out and had a good time with our friends at some bars. First, we went over to Mitch and Clitch's place...which Mitch took his sweet time getting dressed. While waiting, got to see other friends who stopped by, Christie, Berna and Shannon. Wow! It's been a long time since I've seen those 3. Caught up on news and other shit. Then Masa and Emerson came over. As always, Masa and I were always picking on each other. :-) Anyways, the 4 of us finally took off to the bars.

We finally get to Chaos and it was just bare! Saw Lee, Masa, Emerson and Scott. Then, we all headed over to Cobalt. Vee this plasma tv that was showing a gay animated film, but it was G-rated. Boring! heh Saw some other Deafies and a terp there. Went upstairs. Some of the guys were doing the vogue dances. Those are so cool! Clitch can vogue! I is the VEE! heh Mitch was just causing scenes with guys passing by...so funny. Overall, we all had a good time. Me, I was so bad to Clitch. I was sitting on some lounge couch. And somehow, Clitch was giving me a hug and we leaned back and I hit my head on the wall made of stones. So, Clitch got off me and I was covering my face, acting like I was crying. Clitch was all worried and he was just bent near the floor, trying to console me. Then I uncovered my face and said, "sucker!" That surprised him and he fell to the floor. LOL He got up and looked side to side and said "embarrassing!" LOL

Saturday...pretty much did my weekly chores all day. Then went out to MCAD and played their dingo games. We teamed up with David Robertson and Stephen Kimble. SK won $1500. That bitch! Heh, but I'm happy for him. At least, a fag won that coveted cash prize. Then after that, as we were heading home, I was carrying paged convos with Kenny and RT. Gosh, these guys were so funny. Must, must read Kenny and RT's blogs. Wonder what they have to say.

Nothing to do today, except RAD committee meeting. Can't wait to turn in my projects that I had to do. Then, after that, just hafta wait for responses to pour in. Then, grocery shopping. Gosh...weekends, they go by fast.

For those of you that are Deaf and a member of the GLBTiQ community...hope you guys can come to RAD 2005, which will be hosted in D.C.

A little reading? Try Cocked Up

ta ta

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Friday, March 19, 2004

Weekend reading? Try this...BoyDyke.

TGIF!

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Bored? Nothing to do? Need another blog to read? Read Rants & Rave. Happy reading!

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I totally agree with Kenny. I have been asked by a few others of why am I writing blogs. I'm like...why not? Plus, I think it's a good way to increase your writing skills. For some people, it's also a medium to allow one to express feelings and/or opinions...if not, babbling and ramblings will do. :-)

RT...
That must've been a wonderful wet dream for you...Ridorism. Alas, the gang isn't coming up this weekend to NYC as we planned. Oh well...fate? Cuz of snow? Who knows? I still wanna go up there. Maybe Pride Day?

Whooo. Yesterday was drama, drama, drama. Kitch jokingly asked if this week was "make-up week" for me and my friends/loved ones. Me and Clitch (really last weekend), me and Kitch, me and Rosey, me and Dad (this doesn't really count, it was just a matter of having to speak my mind to him to stop OCDing about something). And now, me and Witch? Who knows? My sun and moon needs to get back in orbit. Do you mind?!

Emergency! I read the other day that cicadas will be emerging from the ground after 17 years, just to mate. Read that 17 years ago, people literally had to pull them out of their hair and other shit. Gross! Clitch, keep your mouth closed! LOL

Seen the movie, "The Passion of the Christ"? Last week, I believe, Kitch and I went to go see it. However, Kitch thought that it would be from the birth to the death of Jesus. I told him, no...it's the last 12 hours before his death. This movie is very intense! So much bloody scenes...I was literally closing my eyes every other second. I don't know if I could stomach watching it again. My dad said he's already seen it 3 times.

I mentioned about this movie because this movie has generated so much news. It's been accused of being anti-Semitic. Debates whether or not the Pope has given his blessing. It has caused a riot in Germany. A friend of mine, Elizabeth, told me that a woman had a heart attack and died, during the movie. Dang! Isn't that freaky? You're watching the movie and imagine, the lady next to you is dead? This morning, I read an article that this couple watched the movie. Afterwards, they were discussing about it and it became violent and both were arrested. Oh goodness!

Anyways, Clitch is meeting Kitch and me for lunch today. Fuddy's sure sounds good today.

It's soooo cold outside. Do you mind?! I need the sun...like now...before I lose my "Hispanicness" and people start assuming I'm white. heh

ta ta

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Thursday, March 18, 2004

So, I got your father's death chronologically wrong. Sowwwwwwy about that! You still don't get my point, do you? Your recent wording makes it sound like because you already told the gang your father's death, therefore, not needed to be repeated. I was going through this hard time and I could care less if you told me about your father 100 times. It would at least show me that you undy what I was going through. I'm just saying, I didn't want to bring it up cuz it was not worth it. But you kept inquiring about it and so I gave you a blunt answer. And now, you're all hyperventilating. You even said that maybe you shouldn't have asked me, via blog. Maybe you shouldn't have. Maybe you should have asked me in person, "hey, Litch, what did you mean in your blog on such and such date?"
As for your view that I should have met with you to solve this problem. It took me 6 months before I was ready to talk to Clitch about our problems. You never know that you would be next for our private conversation. You never know that I was saving that story, that I didn't want to elaborate on my blog but you kept persisting, to discuss with you. For all things, a time will come.
Now, we all have views of each other, whether we like them or not. I shared my concerns, about you, with others. Yes, it is a sticky situation. I felt you're the kind of person that has to be asked in order to offer that kind of raw emotions/experience/fears/questions. So, don't be a hypocrite by saying that I talked to others about you and that you have no time for that. You shared your concerns about others to us. Sometimes, you have to talk to others to get a feel of the situation before having that discussion with a person that you're having a problem with.
As I said in my first blog for this morning, arguments are awakenings and cleansing. Perhaps the reason why we're having this drama is because, as someone told me, you and I have never been able to sit down and talk things out, without going into drama mode. We've always been vague and not quite frank. We have this bitchy play and attitude to each other and therefore, it's hard to get across to each other. Perhaps, it's time for us to take that step a bit further.
Again, like I said before, you and I may see this whole situation totally different. You said you did your part and I said nope.
As for me feeling like I was the first one to experience this kind of death...please pay attention to key words. I said, "I feel like I'm the first one, among my peers, to experience this sort of death." Key word(s): I feel like... That doesn't mean that I am "true business" the first one.
If you're all upset about it because we're discussing this on blogs, then send me an email. I was just simply being honest with your question(s). If you can't handle honesty, then don't ask. Until then, if and when you're ready to talk about this, send me an email.

thanks...

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Witch...

Whoa! If you'll read my first blog that mentions the second excerpt, you'll see that I didn't get into it (the story). However, you inquired, via your blog, about what I was talking about. So, you opened up the dialogue. So, if you rather that I express to you in person, then don't ask me what I meant about something, via blog. You said this is a new thing to you...well, better late than never. Also, you knew we had problems, in this regard, yet, we just avoided the issue. You had asked me if there was something wrong between us...I said, I'd rather not talk about it, until a later time. My exact same response to Clitch.
Secondly, expressing my ramblings and emotions of my mother dying is not the same thing as sharing your experience or offering advice. Those are 2 different things. Also, you said you felt that it would be better to leave me alone and to deal with it, at that time...you should have let me made that decision, without assumption on your part.

thank you...

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On a second thought, my answer to the second excerpt might be too vague for you. Why I was cold to you? Because you had mentioned some time ago that your father passed away, right after high school. Somehow, during my mother's last days til her death, I didn't get that support from you. You practically sat there and not offer any support or advice in dealing with the inevitable death of a parent.
I told Kitch and recently to Clitch, that I felt that in order for me to get that support from you, I would have had to ask you for it. I believe, in situations like this, you should have been willing to volunteer to help out a friend in need. Believe me, it would have been useful to me for you to offer some kind of support or understanding...at least, share your experience with me.
I don't know if you were afraid to offer or didn't know what to do in this situation. Maybe we're different. If a friend of mine was going this situation, I would offer my support because I have been there before.
Yet, somehow, I got through my mother's death. I'm here and I'm alright. So, I'm not holding this grudge against you. Was...at that time. But, I've moved on. I just simply hope that you'll remember this. That when a friend of yours, that you care about, goes through this situation, I hope you would be willing to help out by sharing your experience. :-)

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To Witch...

The first excerpt...
Oh gosh, stop acting like Clitch. On your first blog, did you said "hi"? Just that one word in your first blog entry? No, you did not. Geez! You wrote more than that one word. Believe me, there are other blogs that wrote just..."hi."

The second excerpt...
I feel that you did know this was in reference to you. Otherwise, why inquire? Me need elaborate? Not need. If you need a memory, I'd be happy to provide one. Do you remmy when I returned from TX...and I came home...and you were walking out (while you were rooming temporarily with us) and I gave you the cold shoulder? That. Should be enough for you to ponder. Am I making a big deal about it now? No, I was simply expressing how I felt yesterday and the events that led up to that point. :-)

Hope you got your answers...

ta ta

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Wow. Yesterday morning was emotional for me. I'm alright. Thanks to everyone who paged/IM'd me to make sure I was ok. I'd like to start off to thank/address a few friends...

Big thanks to Kenny for his kind support and in remembrance of my mother. He posted lyrics of a song from Evanscance (sp?). This group is really cool. Kitch and I have been watching music videos on Fuse. It's very Deaf-friendly as about 90% of their videos are captions...where as MTV and VH1 has been reducing their captions on videos. Gosh, I can't remember the last time I bought a CD. 2000? 2001? Dang! I guess cuz I don't have a stereo (hem, hem to Kitch: hint for my bday) anymore.

RT, I just love your blog. Yesterday's entry was just hilarious. But I agree with you about the interpreting situation for the "Wicked" play. I would have done the same thing. I would have added "GA" to the interpreter, whose jaw was to the floor, to indicate to go ahead and voice what I said. Do you mind?! Oh, oh...I shall correct myself. RT is not the reigning queen of drama, he's the reigning empress of drama. *royal curtsey bow* "Wicked" is a wonderful book, by Gregory Maguire. Rosey recommended it to me. I loved it. I will and must read his other books.

Witch, you were vague with your question, addressed to me, in your blog yesterday. What reference are you referring to? If you think you know the answer, why ask? :-)

Fighting. Arguments. We hate them but it has to be done. Sometimes, it can even be a cleansing in a relationship or friendship. Kitch and I always tell each other...if you have a problem with me or something, communicate! Yet, somehow, it's like...more communication is needed. You ever feel like, you've communicated and communicated and yet feels like you need to communicate some more? haha Life is so funny! I'm sure Kitch and I feel like that to each other. But, that's good. It lay cards on the table and makes us deal with each one.
Yesterday, during my lunch hour, I was playing Canasta online, with Kitch and I was having a spat with Rosey on AIM. So, imagine switching back and forth. We were just bitching each other out for not being a friend, in the last several days. Nonetheless, we've made up and sewn our heads back on. This was all done within a game. A game of Canasta can be quite long. Although, I don't think the online gamers appreciate my slow playing responses. TFB!
Arguments are also awakenings. It's telling you that something is wrong. Whether is you or that person or both. The worst of an argument, I think, is that you hate to discover that you're the cause of it. Doesn't that bug you? Or turns out that the other person is right. Yet, this is hard because both parties are automatically on the defense mode. One part I hate about arguments is that sometimes, I look back and I find myself sooo immature about the whole thing or that issue. It's like...gawd, I was so immature and why didn't I just get over it or make a big deal about it? And then, I stay mad...not cuz of the argument, it's cuz you're mad at yourself for that shit.
Kitch and I have 3 cats. Sometimes, you'll see 2 of them get into a fight. I'd like to think they're having a spat. I mean...one would like...bother the other cat or bite him...on purpose. I'm like...oh, you're just asking for it! Next thing you know, claws extended and they're like boxing each other. Backs arched. Eyes closed to slits. 3 paws on ground and 1 up in the air, ready to strike. Then, the chase. Then, they kinda leave each other alone. And then, they'll be sniffing each other, after some time has passed, and giving each other a bath. Isn't that weird? Sometimes, I think humans are like that. Yeah, when Kitch and I get into it, we definitely need time alone to cool off. But then, next thing you know, we'll be all over each other, and then we get all horny and then we have to do it ! Make-up sex, isn't that wondeful? Woof, woof!

Stupid, stupid! Adan Burke, a former ASP member (I refuse to call him a bro.) for getting on a panel, which was hosted by Gallaudet's Campus Activity, and trying to trash Alpha Sigma Pi fraternity. The event was called "Christianity vs. Greek Organizations". Apparently, he resigned from ASP, after completing the pledge program because it was against his Christian beliefs. He said that we were worshipping cobras (our "mascot") and it was nothing but dishonesty, idolatry and alcohol abuse. Whateva! Yay!, to our current Archon, Robert Sirvage, for saying that oh, then we must be evil for worshipping the bison, Gallaudet's mascot. (Not verbatim, but you get the gist of it.) What people don't understand is that ASP and other Greek organizations do have Christians/Mormons and other such religious groups as members. We have no problem with you being a Christian or whatever. Just becasue we do some things, perceived as sinful in your views, doesn't mean you have to do it. If you're against drinking, then fine, don't drink. When I was in the frat, we had a bro., Nathan Holmes, who is a Mormon. Of course, he couldn't drink or swear or whatever but he was cool about the whole thing. He didn't preach to us about our "sinful" ways. We'd all have a beer bottle in our hands and he would have a soda can in his. He was cool...he was funny...awesome. And excuse me, being in a frat isn't all about drinking and partying. There's bonding, sharing experiences/stories, retreats and many others. Gosh, remmy those games we played? Indian Wrestling? Black Magic? (Gosh, felt such a fool at that game...haha.) I dunno about you but I had a blast during my time in ASP. (To my fellow ASP bloggers: RT, Clitch, Witch and Kenny....LLASP! )

ta ta!

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Wednesday, March 17, 2004

This is so cruel! How could anyone do that? I'd like to see her starve and have all her bones broken to get almost the same effect of his conditions.

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Clitch, you stupid bitch! When I said in my blog yesterday about people who wrote just simply "hi"...I wasn't referring to you. Geez, if you'll stop sucking those joysticks, you'll be less paranoid. As my cousins would say, "stop acting dumb!"

Anyways...on a serious note, it's been almost 3 months since my mother passed away. It seems lately I've been grieving more and more. Someone said it'll take a year to grieve. My parents once said that you'll always grieve...no matter how long ago someone has passed away, especially a loved one. So, I have been having my grieving moments here and there.

It may seem that lately I might've been self-centered, ignoring the needs of others. Yet, I think you're not supposed to have those "moments" too often, especially if you have a lover/spouse and/or children. They have needs as well. So, when do you get to have those moments? When do you get to focus on your well-being? When is it ok? When is it ok to be alone and "lick your wounds", even if others want to be there for you?

This morning, while I was brushing my teeth, I shed a couple of tears. I was thinking of my mother. I was thinking, "wow, I forgot that I have, at least, 5 disposable cameras, of my mother, in her last days." I was thinking that when I get paid this Friday, I'm gonna drop off these films at the photoshop. It'll be 1 long hour to get them back. I was thinking that when I get these photos back...I'm gonna run to a corner and view these pictures of my beloved mother. I know I'm gonna cry and cry. These will be photos I will want to scan into my heart and mind. These will be irreplaceable. Selfish of me to just want to view them, for the first time, to myself? Yes? No?

At this moment, I feel alone. I feel like I'm the first one, among my peers, to experience this sort of death. Perhaps, I'm meant to share this experience with someone, when they will experience a death of a parent. Although, there is someone who has experienced it, before me, yet somehow I didn't get that support. But that's whole other story and I'm not gonna go into it.

Kitch is there for me, with open arms. I sometimes forget that this can be hard on him. Do I act like the world revolves around me? Perhaps...but not intentionally. It's hard. Siiiighhh....

Momma, I love you! Miss you so much!


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Tuesday, March 16, 2004

Gosh, I really need to learn to proofread my entries before posting them. I guess I just *bored* to do it. (FYI, those reading my blogs..."*bored*" is ASL talk (American Sign Language) as well as "see see" and "vee".)

I changed the template. The green template was just so...blah! This is much better. Like?

ta ta

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I forgot to include the site for Religious Tolerance.

ta ta

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Seriously! Enough with these addicitions! First, it was Ringo.com. I would be like checking it every hour to see who has asked to join my list of friends or whatever. Then, it was Tickle.com...making up a quiz and taking your friends' quizzes. And now, blogging. I'm like...reading other people blogs, every now and then. Even when I get home. Last night, I spent well over an hour, reading blogs, before heading to bed. Finish! Although, I have to say...some blogs are very interesting and others...well, let's just say that they shouldn't have started. They just simply say "hi". And...?

Gay and Christian. Some would say that's an oxymoron, while others wouldn't. Some would say...who cares what you do...your relationship with God is your own business. I agree that one can be Gay and a Christian. But, then why does one have to say..."I'm Gay and Christian." You don't hear other people say "I'm White (or whatever race/ethnicity) and Christian" or "I'm an Alcoholic and Christian" or "I'm a Pot Head and Christian".

I was practically raised in the church. I've been attending church for as long as I can remember. I was first raised as a United Pentacostal. Lots of people would say..."ugh, that's a cult." Whatever. It's not something you would understand. Although, I can understand why they would view it as a cult...it's beyond their comprehension. Before I hit my teen years, my family switched to non-denominational Christianity. I was enrolled in a Christian private school when I was in 5th grade. Graduated from there as a validictorian. Even went on to Bible college for a semester. I didn't hate my private school. I love it!

The earliest age that I can remember being attracted to the same sex was 5. Since then, I never knew it was homosexuality. It wasn't until in my teen years when I first learned that word. I, then, knew it applied to me. From that point on, I would pray to God..."oh please...take this feeling away from me", etc. When I went to Bible college, I knew from that point on, that I would always be gay and nothing would change that.

Solved? Ha! In your dreams! It's even worse...in my opinion, for those who have been raised in a Christian environment and to finally accept the fact that you are gay. It's hard! I mean, how could I, at that time I was 19, throw away 19 years of Christian doctrine, without a second thought? That's just hard. It's not easy. You struggled being gay and verses being recited in your head.

My cousin, Shirley, once asked me, " How can you believe or support a religion that's against gays?" Well, how can I just toss it away? It's like...it's a part of your identity. All I can say is that I'll always believe in God, Christ, etc. Nothing could ever make me renounce Him. Please keep in mind that I'm not saying that I know EVERYTHING about the Bible. I wish...wouldn't that be cool? I just know what I know. I just understand what I understand.

I came out to my parents during Christmas of 2000. My mom said she has suspected all along. Of course, mothers always know. Of course, them being Christians, they have problems with it. I got the numerous lectures/sermons about Heaven and Hell. It's like...God, don't you think I know a thing or two about the Bible?

Recently, I had been Googling about the Bible and homosexuality. I'm just more confused. Been reading this site that's all about religious tolerance. This site maintains that there's a difference between the Liberal and Conservative Christianity. The conservative Christians maintain that all the verses regarding to male-to-male sex is homosexuality, regardless. The liberals state that those verses were applied to the temple priests and Jews of those times. The liberals bring up Greek words and other languages that were mistranslated. They also say that the conservatives do not want to deal with this and just plainly say that homosexuality is wrong. Anyways, instead of going into details...it was a very interesting site and brought up some really good points. (I realized earlier that I said I was confused...I guess I was raised as a conservative Christian and just never knew there was another side to it.)

My mother, who passed away on 12/30/03, shared something with me, in her last days. I believe this was back in October...she wanted to talk to me about my spirituality. I told her...Mom, this is something that's been with me since I was 5. It's not like a recent thing. How do you deal with that? And plus, what's wrong with whom I want to love? What's wrong with me loving Kitch? Mom looked at me and said..."I, as a human, agree with you. I see that you and Kitch love each other. I see that you're happy with him. I wondered...what is wrong with that? It's love, isn't it? Isn't that what matters? However, because I believe in the Bible and the Bible says it's wrong. I, therefore, cannot endorse it." It was somewhat comforting to me. Because I got know what my mother, as herself, felt about my relationship with Kitch.

I've learned to come to the conclusion that everyone is on a different path to the end. I've come to learn that everyone has a different interpretation of the Bible or any other religion or religious texts. I've come to learn that people will always judge you, no matter what you do. You can't make everyone happy. All you can do, is be happy and seek the truth for yourself.

I know some of you will be reading this and say "hey, is that all?" or "you're so wrong". Well, keep in mind that I've left lots of loose ends on this topic or were not quite in chronological order of my spiritual path. I guess I just wanted to babble what was on my mind from some time ago. I know that if I were to tie up loose ends...this entry would be endless.

By the way, if you're interested...check out this site. Smoke and Mirrors Read the entry for 3/15/04, titled Dr. Laura. Read especially the questions below the picture of Dr. Laura. These are some interesting questions and bring up good points.

Anyways, better shut up for now before I keep talking.

ta ta

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Monday, March 15, 2004

If there was a cure for all STD's, including HIV/AIDS...would people be sleeping around more and without a care? That was the question I had ask Mitch and Clitch, the other night. I mean...seriously, think about it. "Oh no, I just got tested positive for HIV. That's ok, I'll just take the treatment plan and it'll go away."

I have to admit something. Before I met Kitch, I wasn't exactly paranoid about STD's. Maybe an occasional thought about HIV/AIDS. What I'm saying is that I had my wild days. Now that I'm with Kitch, I look back and tell myself..."damn, bitch...you sure are lucky, considering your encounters from the past." I tell myself, if Kitch and I should ever break up...I don't think I could go back to my wild ways. Not with the news about staph and syphillis on the rise. Shit! That's scary.

What's even scarier is that I saw an ad in the Metro. It says..."1 out of 6 people, living on Washington, DC, has HIV." There are over 500,000 people living in the District. Imagine the number! Shit! But then, I asked Mitch and Clitch, is that a real fact or just an exaggeration to scare the shit out of us. Well, dunno about you, but that's scary enough for me.

If Kitch and I should ever break up, which I doubt, my hands will be my life-long partners.

Virginia just passed a law that it's a crime to not inform your sexual partners of your HIV status. I know some other states have this law. But is that really efficient? I could be a responsible person, if I were a single person, and ask him of his HIV status and use protection. For all I could know, he could still lie and get laid. This law only works if I find out that I have HIV and I could pinpoint the origin to that mofo! So, just how really efficient is that law?

Anyways...I'm still sick. Although, I have to admit I feel a bit better now than I did an hour ago. God, that would be so nice if I could recover by tomorrow. See, see

Now, I have to start working. Sigh...Mondays.

ta ta

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Sunday, March 14, 2004

Friday...I was so moody all day. Why? Cuz my body just wouldn't consistently lose weight. I mean, I would lose weight but then I'd hit that plateau, which is expected. But I'd be on that plateau for like 3 weeks at a time. Arrgggh! However, this morning, I weighed myself. About damn time! A total of 15 lbs. Yay! I gotta lose some more...LOTS more before I hit the big 3-0! (This summer.)

I is the vee what RT said in his blog on Friday, I believe. He said that from our 9/11 tragic event to Madrid's tragedy on 3/11 is a total of 911 days. Gosh, isn't that freaky? Was that like planned or just a coincidence? I ride the Metro daily to work. I was thinking stuff...like, it could have been NYC or DC. I mean...there is no metal detector in the Metro. So, really, anyone can walk into the Metro with anything on them and no one would be the wiser. I don't really see any security on those outside tracks that lead to the underground tunnel. Mitch said that he's sure they have cameras posted outside. Somehow, that's not comforting to me. My, have these events caused me to become pessimistic or paranoid? I hope not. Life moves on.

Friday night, I finally had that long overdue talk with Clitch. It felt good to have that dealt with, put it aside and move on. I always like it when the gang get together and just talk about different things. Sometimes, we just end up "veeing" things. For example, Kitch, Mitch, Clitch and I were in the cat room, our affectionate name for the guest room. Kitch wanted to watch some music videos. So, we tuned it. And VEE this video. The background was like that of an old scary movie in black and white. This male zombie was "chasing" this lady. You know how it is...the lady is just screaming her head off and not moving. She's upstairs and in a corner room and is trying to open a door...a closet door? Who knows? The zombie gets her and drags her outside. Somehow, he stops and lets her go. She flees for a second and then stops. She turns around and looks at him. She returns to him. Then, he bends over to her head as if he was gonna kiss her on the top. But instead, he bites a chuck of hair and scalp off of her. And she becomes a zombie. Both walk off in a zombie style. I was like...wtf? I wasn't paying attention to the captions but if I had to guess...it was a song about love. You know...you meet someone and you become a part of his/her world or you become one with the other. I would have to watch that music video again.

Saturday, we all got up and went to CMRA meeting. It was good...a good number of people showed up and we had a productive meeting. Short and simple. After that, Kitch, Mitch, Clitch, Witch and I went to 14th street to explore some stores. These stores were obviously gay-owned or gay-friendly. Cute stuff, here and there. Then went into a few furniture or home stores. There were lots of stuff that Kitch and I were talking about for our future home. There was this one centerpiece that I wanted for the dining room table. Kitch like it, except one detail. I was like...oh no no no, we're gonna buy that and put it on the table. And he was like...ewww! Sigh...
Kitch and I came home afterwards. We were supposed to meet with our landlord/friend and his guests to play games. We all love to play games! But somehow, his guest was rude about the whole thing. Originally, she was supposed to show up at 2pm, along with her friend. However, she and her friend went shopping here and there and then went out to a restaurant. Our poor landlord, he just stayed home with his kids, just so that when they arrive, he'll be home and keep them company, until we all meet to play games. If they had decided not to come, they should have told him and I'm sure he would have left the house to do other things. Gosh, don't you just hate wasting the day when your friends don't show up as planned? I would have been pissed off! Anyways, they told him that they would page him after dinner to decide if they were coming or not. I told him, via pager, to ask them bluntly if they're coming or not. I mean, really, quit bullshitting! Yet, they never followed up. Of course, it wasn't like we were surprised they weren't coming over, after all. Nonetheless, we 3 had a good time, playing Euchre and Tri-Bond and Five Crowns.

Today, I'm officially sick. Yuck! I thought I was getting allergies for the past few days. But this morning, after blowing my nose, I knew that I was now sick. So, it's soup slurping, cough drop popping, syrup drinking, nose blowing, whining and bitching time. God, isn't that fun? But I hope I will get over this soon. I have to have my wisdom tooth or teeth pulled out soon. Can't be sick for surgery or the dr. ain't gonna work on me. Damn this wishy-washy weather!

Ta ta!

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Friday, March 12, 2004

Golly! 2 of my friends, or should I say my bitchy "sisters", have been after me to set up a blog account. My excuse was that I don't have time to keep up with blog entries. Unlike the current reigning queen of drama, RT, I don't think I'd have anything to write down that always happening right in front of me. Although, I think KT, my partner, would disagree.

If I had time, I would have prefer to write poetry. I've even thought about taking up scrapbooking. I think that'll be theraputic, in some ways.

However, I thought I'd give this a try. See see how it goes from here on out.

I'm sure if I keep regular blog entries, I will totally bitch out my 2 sisters (that's Witch and Clitch) for not being regular with their entries. If so, oh...I'm gonna slap them so good, my handprint will be forever "tattooed" on them! *Snap*

Ta ta!

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